Sunday, August 3, 2008
Posted at 12:55 AM
just what really happened?
that i have to feign my concern for you.
that i don't want to share my life with you anymore.
that i fake my laughter as i talk to you.
that i find myself thinking really hard to find things that i could say to you to break the silence.
that i don't really care about what happens to us anymore.
that i only ask after you out of courtesy, not curiosity.. nor is it the case that i really care.
that i don't really want to see you anymore.

i hate myself for this hypocrisy.
i amaze myself with how cold i can get; how indifferent i am towards you.

when we used to be what we used to be.
when once in my life, you were almost everything.
when that once in my life actually lasted for more than half of my life.

i scare myself.
especially when i'm feeling like i don't owe you any apology - like right now.

so say goodbye to me now. as i have bid mine to you.
just so i can stop being a bloody hypocrite.